Pontification of Deadlines and Urgency

 Word of the Episode: Pontificate

• Hosts’ Initial Guess:
  • They believed it meant to think deeply to arrive at a decision.
  • They even associated it with careful contemplation and resolution.
• Actual Definition (Oxford Languages):
  • To express one’s opinions in an annoyingly pompous or dogmatic way.
  • Far from quiet reflection—it's about pompous expression.
  • Negative connotation, closer to “know‑it‑all” behavior.
• Additional Meaning: In Roman Catholic Church context, pontificate = officiate as a bishop at mass; also used as a noun for tenure (e.g., “the Pope’s pontificate”).
• Etymology: From Latin pontifex → Old French pontificat → late Middle English pontificate.

👉 Discovery: Many who jokingly say “let me pontificate” are actually self‑insulting.

Main Discussion: Planning, Urgency & Arbitrary Deadlines

• Topic: The tension between:
  1. Big‑picture do‑it‑now mentality (one host = act immediately, finish early, no burden later).
  2. Wait‑until‑necessary mentality (other host = if the deadline is months away, wait; urgency is lower).
• Personal Contrast:
  • One host: finishes things quickly, even taking on extra work (did 3 college senior projectsjust to stay productive).
  • Other host: efficient under pressure but prefers pacing, resting first, “working the system” by doing only what’s required to meet the goal.
• Conflict:
  • Upcoming deadlines set 4 months away — one frustrated at others’ lack of urgency, the other argues most people only act when urgency arrives.
  • Suggested solution: “arbitrary deadlines” to create urgency. But one host feels this is deceptive and prefers transparency.
  • Possible compromise: present early dates as “goals” instead of hard deadlines.
• Reflection on Society:
  • Many people only act under true deadlines or emergencies (“Your lack of planning is not my emergency”).
  • Debate over whether arbitrary goals motivate or manipulate.
  • Hypothesis: People fall into thirds—early planners, motivatable by goals, and last‑minute doers.
  • Closing Pontification: maybe it’s less “thirds” and more Pareto principle (tease for Episode 75).

Tone & Takeaways

• Language Lesson: Pontificate ≠ “think deeply”—it’s “speak pompously.”
• Life Lesson: People manage tasks and deadlines differently; tension arises over efficiency vs. pacing, transparency vs. manipulation, but balance can come with clear goals.
• Humor: Self‑aware jokes about whether they were “pontificating” the whole episode in the negative sense.

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Any views expressed on this podcast are those solely of the hosts and is for entertainment purposes only. None of the content is medical advice or financial advice.

Special thanks to Tim Wright aka CoLD SToRAGE for his permission to use the song Operatique.

Transcript

I Hate Talking: 0:29

-- Welcome to episode 74 of I Hate -- Talking. Hi everyone. So, you have the word or phrase of this episode. OK. The only word I can think of is pontificate. Pontificate. Well, we'll have to think very, very deeply about that word to come up with the definition, I suppose. It's a fun one to say though, right? Pontificate. Yeah, makes you sound knowledgeable about words. It's a big word for vocabulary, I suppose. I guess so. So teach us about it. So we'll look up the official definition and etymology in a moment, but I would sort of put it in the same thing that we've been talking about, I guess, maybe 4 or 5 episodes ago with just the person's ability to take some certain thought or problem and think deeply about it, and that would sort of be pontification. And I think it would be expressly for the purpose of arriving at a specific decision. So if you pontificate, you're going to not necessarily think about something to just know it better or to try to understand something, but specifically to arrive at a decision would be pontification. OK. So you're saying it's not just thinking about something deeply, but it's coming to a conclusion. Yes, I think so. Not necessarily even a conclusion, a decision. Yes, because I think that you could be different. A conclusion could be that you have a particular thought and it is the right or wrong one. And that you are settled in your thought, but pontification is a specific decision making process. OK. Yeah, I mean, if I was going to use it in a sentence, I would use it similar, saying like, I'll need a pontificate on that. And I guess that's what you're saying is like, I'm thinking about it and making a decision. Are we on the right track then? What's the great dictionary say? Well, apparently we're not. Ah. I don't know why this word stuck in my head, but it's a good thing we are learning about it then. Yep, it is. Now, oftentimes our words are ones that are used more frequently over time. This is actually one that was used quite a bit in the 1800s and then has some usage through the 1800s and then dropped off by the 1900s and then is relatively flat through modern time. OK. So according to our favorite Oxford language dictionary. Pontificate means to actually express one's opinions in a way considered annoyingly pompous or dogmatic. Ah, OK, that is actually pretty far off from what we were expecting. Yes, it has nothing to do with thought or decision making or anything. It's actually the expression. Of one's opinions and decisions. We would say like nowadays like you're a know it all or show off or obnoxious or like that those kind of terms. Yes, I suppose so. This is actually the outward expression of ideas in a way that is visible to other people, so it has nothing to do with some of the other terms. That we've talked about in previous episodes where that is more internal thinking processes. This is actually the expression of those opinions and especially in a way that is pompous or dogmatic. So is this negative then if you're gonna pontificate or someone said, Adam pontificates a lot, is that actually an insult or hurtful? It seems so because that's interesting though, because I've heard people refer to themselves as pontificating. So let me pontificate on this. That's actually sort of like a self-insult because it's not actually really a compliment or a good thing to do pontification then. So what they're really saying is, let me be obnoxious and pompous about this. Yes. Or dogmatic, but again, dogmatic, I think carries a lot of negative connotations in modern times. I, yeah, I agree. Interesting. I never would have thought it was a negative term. Now, I don't really consider it a negative term, but maybe now we will and maybe our listeners will as well. So if someone says that to us, we can be like, those are fighting words. When they, when they're confused, we can pontificate and explain to them. Yes, that's true. We can pontificate on the proper definition of pontificate. So there is a second definition which is specifically used in the Roman Catholic Church, where pontificate is another word for officiation or officiate as a bishop, especially at mass. So if a person that holds the office of bishop pontificates. At mass, that would be sort of the normal procedure for a church service by the Roman Catholic Church. OK. And that's just like a role he plays or meaning like, in our culture, we would say like liturgy and that sort of thing. So that's just him. Pontificating? Yes. No, like him organizing the service, is that what you're saying? Yeah, it does seem to have more of organization and sort of that liturgy thing that you mentioned because some of the example sentences here is that the bishop pontificated at 3 Christmas masses or that used as a noun, the Pope enjoyed only a 10 week pontificate. Hm. So it actually can be used in a noun in that particular way. Weird. OK. And now tell us what the words mean, because there's definite separation in the words pontiff, ate. Like there's a break when you say syllable. Yes. I suppose so, but these actually, as we get into the etymology, only came from a single Latin word. Pont effects, and that then later became used as pontificatti and then Pontificate in the late Middle English. So, there is no merging of words here, that is the literal original Latin term came from one single word. Interesting. Well, I'm very glad that you asked me to come up with a word, and the only thing I could think of was pontificate. So I think that's very appropriate if I'm gonna Pontificate this. Wait, how would you use in a sentence now cause I'm confused. So I think the way that most people use it in modern English is as a verb or some participle, not as a noun. I think the noun is gonna be only for the Roman Catholic Church usage. So you are going to pontificate or you pontificated or you're pontificating or you're participating in pontification. -- Pont -- is that a word or are you just making that up? Pontification? I mean it works, so I'll believe you. I think so, yeah, pontification. That is the act of pontificating, OK. So are you saying that we pontificate on this podcast? I hope not. I don't want to be pompous. Up until this point in this episode, I would have thought that we were pontificating and that was actually sort of a good thing. But maybe now I've learned something myself and now we can see this particular word in more of the realistic and negative connotations. Well, see, that's why we're doing this. Now we're learning. We are learning. So, very well done with our word or phrase of the episode, Pontificate. And yes, I think learned quite a bit about the actual definition, as well as some interesting things about the etymology that that was one singular word and really has not changed all that much in the history and usage of that particular word. OK, interesting. I can't help myself though. What are we going to pontificate about on this episode? We said, save it for the pod. We were going to talk about the difference in seeing the full scope of what needs to be done and acting accordingly versus only seeing a minuscule part of what needs to be done in order to engender urgency for the people that have to do things. I think you're pontificating your opinion -- about -- which one of those is the way I describe that is a little bit biased. It's very biased. I know which way you think is better. Yeah, OK, yeah, that's what we said, we're like, we got started getting into it while I was cooking dinner, and we're like, saving for the pod, we'll talk about it there. So, you love to have a timeline. This will even go back in our marriage, not even work-related, uh, often, like, say you get home from work, I want to spend time with you, like catching up or holding hands or cuddling or anything, make that connection, like physical connection and emotional connection, but you can't until the chores are done. And then you rest, where I want to rest and then do the work. And so I think this plays into it where we had an issue come up. And you are confused at why other people don't have a sense of urgency, but the deadline is like 4 months away. That's how they knew that most people are gonna wait. They have 4 months, there is no urgency, they're gonna do it when it's convenient, or they're gonna forget about it and do it at the very end. And that bothered you extremely, right? Is that fair to say? It did bother me. I wouldn't say extremely, but are you pontificating again? No, I it did bother me, yes. And I think there's maybe even two different topics there with the resting versus working and the urgency versus Just sitting on your laurels, so to speak, and that's probably two different topics. Though they are interrelated. Well, I know for myself, if I have an entire day and I have one thing to do, it takes me the whole day to do it. No, I would take the exact opposite approach. I would be like, if I only have one thing to do, I'm going to get it done as the very first thing and then I don't have to worry about it. No, and then if I have a million things to do, I am so much more productive because I have to be. But if I only have one thing in a minute, enjoy myself and take my time. I think this did get me into trouble in school and maybe even a little bit at work because if there's quote unquote like extra time, I will just work ahead and like get extra things done. And then you do like, then you have extra work to do because they're going to give you more work. Well, I did do 3 senior projects in college, so finished 1. I was like, what am I going to do? I guess I'll do another one. And then I finished that one and I said to myself, what am I going to do? I guess I'll do another one. So I, I did 3 senior projects in college. I could have only done one, I guess, because that was all that was required. I mean, I love that about you, but also, do you think that long term that helped you? Yes, I do, because I think I got my very first job because of my particular quote unquote extracurricular activities and having that project experience did set me apart from other candidates. OK. I mean, that's fair to say. I feel like I've always prided myself when I pontificate on myself is that I'm using it. I like to work the system. So, I look at what needs to be done for Like, yeah, again, if we're talking about college, in high school, I remember looking and the I only had one college I wanted to go to. I didn't even apply to any other college. And I knew what their criteria to get in was, and the criteria for the scholarships as eligible for, and I did that and stopped. So my senior year, -- I went home at -- noon work during high school at a college course level and I got into colleges that I didn't even apply to. Yeah, because I did college work at this college and they were like, Oh, you're doing pretty good. So you want to come here? And they accepted me preemptively before I had even applied, -- which -- is amazing and that's so cool, but you still didn't go there. I only wanted to go to this college. So if someone had offered me, I mean, maybe, I don't like say even Harvard or Yale, I don't think I'd even go there if they had offered. Because I was so adamant that this is where I was gonna go. So I don't know. I think it depends. And then also in school, I was the person that broke the curve. So everyone hated you. Not everybody. There are other people that broke the curve and it was sort of almost like a competition on like who could break the curve the most. And so there was like maybe 2 or 3 other people that would do the same thing and like try to achieve like super high scores and see who could break the curve the worst. I wonder if that's, uh, y'all tell us if that is a major or emphasis determined. Like different majors are going to behave differently within college courses, right, because I feel like a stereotype. Well, this is a good example because it was a group of engineers that were trying to break the math majors curve. Well, that's OK. See, that's what I'm saying. Like I feel like that would be stereotypical that I'd expect. My major, we were very much advised, I mean, academics mattered, but we were advised by our professors that it mattered more that you had boots on the ground, life experience for my major. So we did it, and I mean, I wasn't summa cumlata. I was the next one technically, but they said they'd rather you get a B. And have a ton of experience and straight A's with no experience. So, if somebody, and there were once in a while, obnoxious people that would do above and beyond and mess up the curve, and we did not like them. -- And I personally -- were these people in the same major or people that were taking classes as like part of their major that weren't? Yeah, they were like jumping in, this wasn't their major. Was it elective or was still required? For them it was probably elective. I can't think of a single person that I had those feelings for that it was their major. See, but I had to take math courses and all the engineers had to take math courses as well. Our engineering department did emphasize projects and that was part of the reason that I had senior projects and different internships and everything like that, but we also had to take math courses as part of our Major requirements. -- So -- did you do this to hurt the math people or to prove yourselves better? It was not necessarily to hurt people. No, there was not necessarily any vindictive motivation. It was more of the competition to see who could like score the best and break the curve the most amongst the engineers against the maths, there is like a rivalry between engineers and math magicians. Yes, there was a bit of one. Yes. Are you offended if I were to tell someone you're a mathematician? Is that offensive -- or just not -- accurate? Still be very proud of being titled mathematician, but not nearly as much as engineer or like physicist, which I'm not, but if that was my title, that would be in the hierarchy of things above math. Sorry to all our math listeners out there. Yes, if you're listening, sorry, because the reason I ask is I've used that term for you before. Two of our kids are very gifted in math. And so, it's obvious when they're doing their schooling, people that test them or whatnot. And if they bring it up, I kind of just like, oh yeah, their dad's a mathematician, or their dad's into math. And I kind of use it that way, and then it makes sense. I didn't know if that was offensive, or if that's not even an accurate term. I am perfectly fine with saying that I'm into math or good at math, but actual title, mathematician. No, -- I would rather -- claim is a mathematician. We're getting two words now. Is there a specific criteria to be a mathematician? There is, they have to be proficient at math and usually higher math. There's a meme that was circulating even back in my college days. I think of it and see if I can find it. But it's basically like there's a fire in a building and the mathematician solves the equation and knows that there's a fire extinguisher, and that's good enough. And like the physicist knows that there's a fire extinguisher and is able to explain how the handle has to be pressed and then the gas would be released and then the engineer is actually the one that grabs the fire extinguisher. And pulls the pin, aims the thing, squeezes the handle, and sprays the fire out. OK, I mean, I can see how, yeah, there's a different hierarchy there from your vantage point would you differently. Yes, I agree too. I mean, from my vantage point, I agree with you. I'm sure that there's others that don't, because that's why they do their way, which is what we were saying earlier, right? I understanding that the way we do something makes sense to us, but as a whole, as a group of people, It doesn't always make sense or isn't always the way it's done. That's true. So to put it simply, in this current example in our lives. That I will try to do things as fast as possible, as completely as possible, even though the deadline is 4 months away. Where apparently, I guess that is not the majority consensus on how things work. Oh, you have 4 months. OK, from my perspective, even in our situation, is we're really busy right now. I feel like August and September, this year for us are exceptionally busy. So, I leaned towards waiting till October when things die down a bunch, but you're like, we gotta do this, we gotta do it now. And I'm like, uh, like, in October, we're going to be able to catch our breath more. So why are we plowing ahead and killing ourselves right now to get this done? I suppose so, but it's getting done, and then and then it will be done and then we have nothing more to do. But do you think you're gonna want to keep going and perfecting it even more? I feel like you will. If I have the capacity to do so, I suppose. Yeah, I'll do like a, to put it in terms of colleges 2nd and 3rd senior project. Right, that's like, we only need to do one senior project, so. But then, but then you can't be the best of the best. Sometimes it's good to be the best of the best, sometimes it's good just uh. Be with your family That's true. I mean, part of this activity that we're doing is with family though. It's true. Not everyone likes doing it. Well, maybe they should learn that they should do things at the very start and do it well. Get it over with, get it over with and be successful and be proficient and accomplish things. I guess, but I think one of the things we were chatting about. Because if it comes to the point, later in 4 months, people might not have the opportunity to do this particular thing. That's true. I mean, we might break the curve for them. That's, that's not good overall. It's good for us personally, but not as a whole. Perhaps, but it's good for the organization in general, maybe. I think it is. But I think that was one thing we were chatting about was I suggesting to you to make arbitrary deadlines. Because that sets a sense of urgency and kind of puts it in people's, like the front of their minds versus just, this is your task, get it done in the next 4 months. But if you're told you have got 3 weeks, I think people are gonna be much more urgent in their actions. That's true. It is an adjustment for me because perhaps I make my own arbitrary deadlines and other people do not. So having to create them for them seems like something I shouldn't have to do and also almost feels deceptive because like we know everything that needs to be done in a certain time frame that it needs to be done and by creating these quote unquote arbitrary deadlines by which things that don't actually have to be done and communicating that they have to be done by a certain point in time. Feels a little bit deceptive to me. OK, that's interesting. Tell me more about that, because could you justify saying yes, these are arbitrary deadlines, but this weighs on you more than most people because you are supervising this. So you want them to get it done so that you don't have obligation and the weight on you. It's true. I still think that when push comes to shove, that I would prioritize transparency above arbitration. Would you think that people would, if they found out that you made this arbitrary deadline, they'd trust you less? Perhaps because I feel like in past experiences with similar things. There have been arbitrary deadlines and I found out about them after the fact, and I don't appreciate that. I would have rather known ahead of time and plan accordingly and acted accordingly. Because now in my personal execution of things, I have an additional task and deadline that could have been accomplished earlier, but because you didn't tell me about it, now I have to do extra things later when it could have been done earlier. So you're feeling the weight of like, I could have prioritized something else, I prioritized this, and it was not necessary. Correct. Yeah, I mean, for intents and purposes, they were not transparent and then therefore, I may have prioritized the wrong things or done things in an inefficient manner. And if I had seen the big picture, I could have done things faster, better, and with more efficiency. OK. I mean, I do hear that, and I want to like understand that and validate it. I'm thinking that it's kind of the same thing. I'm like, we need to catch our breath. We're so busy. And they're like, no, we got to get it done. We're still prioritizing something that doesn't need to be a priority. So is this about us or the other people? I don't know. I guess both. But when we were talking earlier and it started to get heated, I was like, let's save it. Let's talk about this later, was about other people. But I think, I see both points. I think I was in a kind way, I hope in a kind way, trying to tell you that the reason you're in the position you are, is because you're very on top of things, very organized, very, you prioritize things. That's why you have your position. Right, and other people because they don't have these quote unquote arbitrary deadlines are not doing anything. So therefore, I am taking it upon myself to do things because other people are not doing things because they don't feel motivated as I do. Right, they're probably prioritizing something else. We don't know what's in their lives. They could have a lot of work or other obligations, you know, so we see from our perspective, I'm just saying that they could have a whole bunch more that we don't know about. And are not prioritizing this, even though it is a priority for you. That's true. So we don't know everything that's going on in their lives, but your hypothesis and pontification is that perhaps they don't have other things going on in their lives and that the reason that they're not doing anything is because they don't have an arbitrary deadline. Yeah, I mean, OK, I don't like the word pontificate. Half an hour ago, I would have been like, yes, that's what I think. I, that's what I pontificate. Now I'm like, oh, don't, don't say that to me. But yes, I agree. I think that's what I think. I know that's how I think often when I do not have a strict deadline, it takes me a lot longer to get something done. And it's like, again, that meme or bumper sticker or anything like that you see where it says, your lack of planning is not an emergency for me, saying that you didn't plan well and now you're causing an emergency for me. Yeah, that's my exact point is that I am planning super well and giving people 4 months so that they don't have any emergencies. But there's a reason that's a bumper sticker. -- It's a reason -- because people only act if there's emergencies. Yeah. Yeah, I think so. Earlier, even though I was like, Google it, I bet there's statistics. -- So did -- you? I did not. I didn't even know how to ask the question. Yes, I guess we'll have to ask that question. Maybe you, our listeners can weigh in on this and tell us if. It is intrinsically motivating if you see the big picture as I do, or if you have quote unquote arbitrary deadlines. Again, my bias is coming out in this, so perhaps you can tell what the difference is in what the different categories might be, but I want to justify you and say, I do think your way is proper and best practices. I don't think it's what society does. And it like call back to years ago, we had a very different event that you, again, you were in charge of, and you gave people, do you remember this? You gave people like a 2 month notice and somebody responded with, I'm not sure what I'm gonna do, but if I'm free, I'll come. You were like, that's why I, I gave you 2 weeks, months to remember this to like mark it on your calendar and make this a priority. But 2 months in advance, even though it sounds good, oh, mark it on the calendar, this is a priority, unless it's like a wedding or some big event like that. Most people don't. And then it's whatever is most convenient, the best opportunity kind of thing comes up. And I understand, I was frustrated too when I saw that. And I was like, what? But I think that's the general society concept we have. I guess because it does surprise most people when I tell them that we're already planning things for June of 2026. So we're booked, we're booked. Y'all don't plan anything with us until probably October of 2026. No, I think probably July has some things on it. August is probably not really planned yet. August of 2026. Yeah. So, we're, we're 12 months out at this point. Yeah, y'all tell us cause I'm so curious. I don't think that's true though, of most people. I do not think that your typical American society plans out 12 months in advance. And not just like big events, yes, like, you're getting married, so we're gonna plan that. But this is like weekends, key events were booked. Yes, specific dates with specific times. 12 months from now. We had an event. I, I guess this shows that we were just too, too overbooked cause we had an event yesterday, and 2 weeks ago somebody started planning it, and they gave two dates. Everybody was good with both dates, and we were the only ones that were like, we can only do this one. And so we did that one. We did that one. There was other people that preferred they had a, yes, that's true. But we were the only ones that said we will only be one. -- This is the only one we -- can do. And I do think that says something about us that's not a good thing. That's probably something we should pontificate and change in our lives. Well, as we learn, pontificate is, yeah, I feel like we're pretty pompous and dogmatic that we were the only ones that had won 8 only. He eats out You don't agree. You don't agree though. OK, y'all, you have to let us know because I would definitely set as a planner before we got married. -- I like planning -- things. And then he met me. -- And -- then I'm like, oh, I'm, I'm willy-nilly all the time. So it is interesting that out of my social circles and family, I was the biggest planner. And now it looks like I just fly by the seat of my pants, compared to you and your family. I suppose so. I, I think there has to be a middle ground though, and I really love your heart on not wanting to be deceptive with arbitrary plans. Could be worth it and not saying like the deadline is such and such date. Cause that's deceptive. What if we said we would like our goal is to have this done by such and such state. Because that is a goal, right? Would that make you feel better? Would that count at all? Or is that still, still too deceptive? Yeah, I don't think there's anything wrong with saying that you desire something to be done ahead of schedule. So, could that be something we moving forward saying to them, when there's not a sense of urgency saying our desire, our goal is to get this done by this date. Yeah, that's perfectly fine. I think from the truthfulness aspect of things. OK. I don't know if it engenders the sense of urgency that you are thinking will be created by these arbitrary deadlines, -- but maybe it -- will. I, I, it would for me, but I'm also, we've already established so many times in the past that I'm a big people pleaser. So if I hear, my goal is. I'm gonna work so hard for that goal, because I want that person to be happy and reach their goal. So maybe it's the law of thirds. There's a 1/3 of people that will do things as fast as possible. There's 1/3 of people that will do things when there is some sort of goal presented, and then there's 1/3 of people that will do things at the very last minute, no matter what. Yeah, I think that's fair enough because there are, and I do agree with you. There are some people like that like some due that day at 8 a.m. And it's like 6 a.m. and they're typing away. It's like, yo, or then they'd wait and ask for an extension. So, I do sympathize with you there. Yeah, the more I reflect on it, maybe it's not the law of thirds. Maybe it's more of Pareto. What's that mean? Well, we'll find out next time. Here we go. So we've done a lot of pontification. If you, I hope not. Oh, maybe we haven't. Or maybe our listeners think we have. Well, nonetheless, whether we did or not or whether you think we did or not, let us know let us know, like, share, subscribe or not. I mean, we haven't really gotten much feedback at all, so I'd welcome anything at this point in time. I don't know. I don't like mean people. Well, we'll just turn off comments from your. I won't look. I just don't look and we'll see for our next episode. I want to know about that. OK. All right, so I guess we made up for our shorter episode last time and we'll see where we end up for duration in episode 75. So good. So from your friends at I hate talking until next time, remember, it is only through talking that we begin the journey to understanding.